How To Feel Confident In Bed After Pregnancy

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It’s normal in pregnancy to look forward to intimacy after the baby arrives. Things will finally go back to normal, right? But it’s also common to struggle with your confidence and body images after a baby. This can easily impact your sex life. Even if you’ve never struggled with intimacy before, you may have a hard time feeling comfortable or getting in the mood.

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It can take time and effort to rebuild your confidence in bed after pregnancy, and that’s okay. Go at your own speed and comfort level, and try the following tips to take hold of your intimacy.


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Put On A Good Outfit

Many women are not completely comfortable being naked right after a baby. But you don’t need to be in your birthday suit to enjoy intimacy with your partner. If you feel more comfortable with something on, then go ahead and do it. Consider picking up a new set of lingerie or a sexy dress to get you in the mood. Putting on something that makes you feel good about your body will instantly boost your confidence, and your partner will definitely take notice.

Communicate With Your Partner

To avoid miscommunication and conflict, it’s important to be honest with your partner. If you’re not regularly intimate (especially if they try to initiative, but you’re not ready), they may feel as though they’ve done something wrong. But letting them know you’re struggling with confidence can reassure them the lack of intimacy is nothing to do with them, One Medical explains.

Furthermore, ensuring your partner understand can help you feel more comfortable in bed. They can say and do things to increase your confidence. Conversely, if your partner is shaming you or contributing to your low confidence, this pattern will continue if unchanged. Address if there’s anything your partner is doing or saying that’s hurting your confidence further so you can fix it together.

Address Your Insecurities

If there’s a specific thing that’s affecting your confidence in bed, it can be helpful to target and address it. Maybe you’re self-conscious about new stretch marks, or how your stomach and breasts look now that you’ve had a baby. There are things you can do to change what you perceive as an imperfection. Consider a stretch mark cream or oil or find a bra that flatters your chest and makes you feel more confident.

Taking control over the situation and feeling like you’re doing something about it can reduce your anxiety, thereby allowing you to feel more confident. The less focused you are on the insecurity, the less it will impact your intimacy.

Even just doing a low-impact workout or spending some time at the gym can greatly boost your confidence, both mentally and physically. Be sure to follow your doctor’s guidelines for physical activity – you shouldn’t start working out (or making any significant lifestyle changes) without the go-ahead.

Remember – you absolutely do not need to change yourself to feel confident. While addressing an insecurity can help some people feel comfortable in their own skin, for others, it can feel like a compulsion or obsession. You’re beautiful just the way you are in your postpartum body. Only change your appearance if it’s going to make you feel happier and more confident.

Take It To Professionals

If you’re really struggling with your confidence in bed after pregnancy, you may benefit from some extra help, and there are many ways you can go about this. Maybe you just want to feel sexy in your body again. Consider signing up for a pole dancing class or salsa lessons – any sort of movement that’ll make you feel sensual and strong.

Or you may find it helpful to speak to a therapist who specializes in body image. Addressing the root of your insecurities (it likely goes beyond having a baby) can help you address and resolve it. Plus, body image and intimacy issues can be hard on your mental health, so having someone to talk to can ensure you’re promoting your well-being.

Find Support In Other Moms

It’s easy to feel as though no one can relate to what you’re going through as you struggle with postpartum confidence. But most women who’ve been pregnant have gone through similar internal struggles, so you can relate to their experiences. Don’t hold your insecurities inside. Open up to trusted female friends who’ve gone through similar experiences. Not only will this make you feel less isolated, but you can learn through what they did to bring confidence back into their intimate life.

If there’s no one in person you feel comfortable talking to, find support online. Follow accounts that discuss related subjects or join groups (like on Facebook or Reddit) where you can freely discuss your experience and ask for advice.

Sources: One Medical, Bliss Hood, Boldiva,

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